How to Deal with Religious People if You Are an Atheist

Step 1

1

Don’t bring up the subject unnecessarily. You should never feel like you have to lie or pretend about what you believe (or don’t). If you’re asked about your religious beliefs, be honest. However, you also don’t need to be a walking advertisement for atheism at all times either.

If you’re in a room full of believers, think carefully before steering the conversation towards your lack of belief. There’s nothing wrong with sitting quietly sometimes, and it never hurts to listen to others talk about what they believe.

We all have to sometimes listen to people talk about subjects we don’t care for or don’t understand — hockey, poetry, auto repair, or whatever it may be. Just “sit it out” and wait for the subject to change.

Step 2

2

Keep the focus on other topics. Instead of sitting back and hoping the conversation doesn’t turn toward religion, or waiting for it to pass on to another subject if it does, you can work to steer the conversation towards topics that may be more comfortable for everyone involved.

Consider the audience, and bring up topics that are likely to be of general interest. It may seem trite to discuss sports or the weather at Thanksgiving dinner, but it’s probably preferable to a knock-down, drag-out fight over deeply-held religious beliefs. Even politics may be a less contentious topic to bring up.

For example, if your religious friends start to discuss their church activities try saying, “That’s great you’re so involved in your church. What other activities do you enjoy doing outside of church? I’ve been trying to find some new activities to do.” This is likely to shift the conversation to jet-skiing, stamp collecting, volunteering at an animal shelter, etc.

Step 3

3

Refrain respectfully or partially engage in prayers or religious rituals. As an atheist, there will be times when you will feel you need to stand up for what you believe — be it the teaching of creationism in public schools or prayers before city council meetings. It’s okay to decide that every little thing isn’t worth fighting for, though — like choosing to simply sit quietly during a prayer before a group meal. You have to decide for yourself when to “let things go.”

If someone happens to complain that you aren’t bowing your head during the prayer or showing the proper reverence in some other setting, calmly offer to discuss the topic privately later.

If, for instance, you are at Thanksgiving dinner and are asked to give some sort of blessing or say what you are thankful for, you can do so without invoking any god or religion. Say something like “I am thankful for the people who grew this food, those who provided it, and those who prepared it. I am thankful that we can all be together now to enjoy it, and each other’s company.”